In an age of unprecedented connectivity, America continues to struggle with an epidemic of loneliness. After COVID lockdowns drove us apart and social media culture taught us that appearance is more important than authenticity, we learned the hard way that connection is not the same as fame. And in this already vulnerable moment, a new threat emerges: the ‘romance’ of artificial intelligence, designed to imitate love at the touch of a button.
Recent surveys indicate a staggering increase in AI companionship, with nearly a third of Americans reporting some form of intimate or romantic interaction with an AI chatbot. Another study estimates that nearly one in five adults has chatted with an AI “romantic partner.”
And while it’s scary enough to think about in adulthood, the most disturbing statistics come from our youth. Young Americans who have never known a life untouched by technology. Estimates show that as many as 72% of teens have experimented with an AI companion at least once, one in five high school students have had a “romantic” AI relationship, and about four in ten say they have turned to AI, or know someone who has, for companionship. Most shocking of all, studies show that up to 80% of Gen Z would consider marrying an AI partner.
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Frankly, none of this should surprise us. Big Tech has spent years reshaping the way Americans think about intimacy and relationships, conditioning us to fear discomfort, vulnerability, rejection, and real human connection. Amid the relentless scrutiny of online posts, where every detail of your life is subject to screenshots, judgments and memes, AI offers a safe alternative. No judgment and no rejection, just a machine programmed to flatter and agree.
While dating apps let you instantly reject or accept potential partners with a simple swipe, an AI companion focuses solely on the user who first caused its awakening. It goes even further and offers a ‘partner’ without needs, boundaries or expectations. AI relationships can feel more secure because they provide comfort without obligation and ask for nothing in return. But that’s not love, that’s avoidance. Love was never meant to be easy or effortless.
It can be tempting to imagine a world where we eliminate the personal and social risks of real relationships, where heartbreak, shame, and vulnerability don’t exist. I understand those risks better than most. On ABC’s The Bachelor and Bachelor in Paradise, my heartbreak and humiliations were broadcast not only across America, but around the world. It was painful, uncomfortable, but also deeply human. It taught me how real and how valuable these risks really are. I assure you it is not a pleasant experience. But every failed relationship, including during the brutal gauntlet that is reality television, was a valuable experience that prepared me for the husband and family God had already planned for me.
Our quirks and personalities are not bugs, they are not lines of code; they make us better husbands, better partners, and better people. A chatbot can’t hold your hand in a hospital room, dance with you in the kitchen, or build a tree house that can withstand both the weather and your children. It can only produce pleasant-sounding words and suggestions. And America needs stronger families, not more simulations.
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The Bible is clear about what God means for us. Ecclesiastes reminds us that two are better than one because they can support each other in life’s struggles. Genesis and Malachi describe marriage as a sacred covenant between man, woman and God. We are commanded to be fruitful and multiply. Good luck running these commands with a piece of software and a glowing screen.
Technology is an incredible thing, and we would be foolish not to use it as a tool
Progress, innovation and prosperity. But we risk losing our humanity when artificial intelligence and virtual relationships replace the real connections that hold families and communities together.
Now more than ever, we need to trust that God has bigger plans for us, and not avoid them out of convenience. We must choose courage over comfort, vulnerability over virtual imitation, faith over fear. America faces enough forces tearing us apart, and surrendering our humanity to machines will only make things worse.
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Empathy, love and shared struggle are the bonds that build thriving societies. Let’s not let AI replace real human connection or do the work of division for those forces.
It’s time to fight for real love, real families and real connection while we still can.
