On New Year’s Eve we sang “Auld Lang Syne” and hoped that old acquaintances were not forgotten. But 2025 has been a tidal wave of good and bad news, and chances are you’ve forgotten some of it… or tried. Luckily for you, I’m on the case. Here are the craziest stories of 2025.
This year there were a lot of crazy animal stories, from alligators ringing the doorbell to wild zebras. And equally crazy stories about politicians, because it’s the US of A and some people are very angry with the president. But these are the seven stories that stood out the most in our crazy 2025.
1. Taking a bite out of the law
This remains one of the craziest stories I’ve ever seen in a workplace. We’ve all witnessed (or experienced) coworkers stealing lunches, not taking baths, or worse. But our friends at the big law firm Sidley Austin had a summer associate/intern who thought learning the legal profession was a bit (or a bite) too far. I want you to start humming the theme from “Jaws” and imagine this situation in the workplace.
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According to Above The Law, “A Biglaw summer associate bit people at the firm – with her teeth.” The site dubbed her the “Biglaw Biter” after she rejected several other options, including “Associate Lecter.”
The site reported that at least five people had been bitten and that “a fake quirky manic pixie dream girl crossed with the Donner party vibe.” Since I first wrote this there has been an update. Think of it as a dessert.
Parade magazine said she even bit a staff representative, but that’s understandable. An officemate reportedly started wearing long sleeves to protect himself from Ms. Jaws.
Fortunately, she was eventually fired, but I expect she could be appointed to the Ninth Circuit at any time now.
2. No, not the ‘Hunger Games’ guy
Unless you’re a “Hunger Games” fan, when you hear “PETA” you think of the crazy people who do bizarre things to get us to stop eating meat. So far, meat eaters win with the fork raised. That hasn’t stopped PETA from making my crazy list several times in 2025.
The logo of the animal rights activist group PETA. (Paras Griffin/Getty Images)
I have to admit I laughed when PETA tried to get Wesleyan students to put up a plaque “in memory of the millions of chickens, cows, fish, pigs and others that were killed and served there as food.” But my favorite PETA moment came last winter when some of their poop promoters tried to dump a truckload of manure on their competitors at the American Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals, or ASPCA. That’s when things really got going.
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The dumpers must have had manure for brains because their cargo froze during the peak cold front in Manhattan. That left one frustrated PETA person hacking away at manure circles as a vision of the Good Humor guy written by Stephen King. The pair were arrested and left their truck as they were – full of… manure.
3. Brazil nuts
This year there was another grift-a-thon for the climate: COP30. The Mother Nature Summit was held in Brazil’s Amazon, or what was left of it, after they cut down countless trees to build twelve kilometers of “a new four-lane highway cutting through tens of thousands of hectares of protected Amazon rainforest.” They had the audacity to call the scorched earth road the Avenida Liberdade or Avenue of Liberty. That’s like saying that communist countries are ‘democratic republics’. One of the objectives of the event was ‘sharing insights and best practices’. I’m pretty sure that clearing 13 kilometers of jungle cannot be considered environmentally friendly.
A view of the COP30 logo at Docks Station in Belem, Para State, Brazil on October 24, 2025. (Photo by THOMAS MORFIN/AFP via Getty Images)
The scam (ahem!) attracted over 56,000 vacationers (visitors) and of course they needed a place to party. So Brazil docked two large cruise ships nearby to accommodate poorer delegates. One advertised that it offers “11 restaurants, 12 bars, three pools and eight hot tubs.” They ended up making us all green with envy.
4. Shell station
Oregon’s JD Holt is probably still playing the shell game. Holt is a member of the Oregon Health Authority on Mental Health Best Practices. This was Oregon, so when a meeting was called, the introductions naturally became pronoun-heavy in the most unique way.
Holt began, “Hello everyone, it’s JD. I use they, them and turtle for my pronouns,” according to The Daily Mail. For those of you who missed this story the first time, our turtlish friend goes by “JD Terrapin” on Facebook. Big Ten or long-time ACC fans know that a Terrapin is a type of Maryland turtle. (Usually someone not known for football.)
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That’s the kind of interesting life choice designed for TikTok or something called Gender Wiki. GW calls it ‘tortoise gender’ or ‘tortoise gender’, as if it were real.
I’m sure if the Democrats had won in 2024, we’d be spending millions on turtle sanctuary somewhere.
5. They created the meme
Those of us who remember the 2020 BLM riots remember CNN’s claim that they were “mostly peaceful.” The media went there again in 2025 when the left in Los Angeles rose up against ICE.
You can’t throw a rock or Molotov cocktail without seeing the word ‘peaceful’ in the news. CNN described this round of left-wing violence, saying people there protested “initially peacefully.” That’s more or less inevitable, unless rioters leave their homes halfway through Donnybrook.
The New York Times mentioned “largely peaceful” twice, along with “peaceful” in describing the violence. Reuters also said: “largely peaceful.” “The View,” which is never “peaceful,” host Whoopi Goldberg had pretended, “it’s been peaceful for days.”
California Highway Patrol used smoke grenades to advance and push protesters off the 101 Freeway during a demonstration following federal immigration operations in Los Angeles, California on June 8, 2025. (Blake Fagan/AFP via Getty Images)
My favorite was NPR, which also claimed that things were “mostly peaceful.” Certainly, just as NPR was “largely neutral” in its reporting for years. Fortunately, it is now 100% unfunded by taxpayers. Thank you, Mr. President.
A protester places debris into a fire as Border Patrol personnel in riot gear and gas masks stand guard outside an industrial park in Paramount, California, on Saturday, June 7, 2025. (AP Photo/Eric Thayer)
6. How are you, wabbit?
You knew I couldn’t ignore all the animal stories. Colorado’s nightmarish wild rabbits still give me the chills. The Associated Press reported in August about a group of rabbits with… horns. (Your joke goes here ______.)
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Yes, these demon bunnies were straight out of “Night of the Lepus,” but instead of “mostly peaceful,” they are “mostly harmless.” The cottontail rabbits suffer from the shope papillomavirus, which causes wart-like growths that protrude from their heads and resemble horns.
This June 26, 2013 image taken from a video by Gunnar Boettcher shows a rabbit in Mankato, Minnesota, infected with the shope papilloma virus. (Gunnar Boettcher via AP, file)
The Washington Post headline about the infected rabbits sounds like it came straight out of a 1950s science fiction movie: “They’re Harmless, Experts Say.” (You can imagine a terrified family hearing that on the radio as giant horned rabbits break down their door.) No experts were hurt because they were smart enough to send journalists instead.
7. AI!
I found most of former CNN anchor Jim Acosta’s career more disturbing than the bunnies. But now that he’s a media afterthought, he’s outdoing even himself.
Jim Acosta during his Substack show on August 4, 2025. (Jim Acosta show)
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The Mouth That Roared during Trump Season One has now resorted to interviewing artificial intelligence pretending to be someone who has died.
In this modern-day quackery, Acosta spoke to a computer avatar of a deceased teenager named Joaquin Oliver. It was just another anti-gun stunt for artificial intelligence humans, best friends and lovers.
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I’ve since dubbed such AI “grief bots” or “digital immortality,” and new software is available for the gullible and desperate to recreate their lost.
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It’s a brave new world, okay, except that “Brave New World” was a dystopian satire. And this is, oh yeah, real.
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